The whole point of this is that I need to have a little self-control. The siren song of the XBox has already beckoned me towards the reef, but I didn't get dashed upon the rocks...that time. I resisted it yesterday, but I'm heading in for about an hour of fun since I did repent. Maybe I should use the games as a carrot cum reward. For every task accomplished, say a chapter written, I can play a half hour. Each vocal practice equals a commensurate unit of play.
At any rate, here's my to-do list for Winter (need not be sequentially accomplished):
- Finish Book
- Audition for band
- Sing karaoke at a bar
- Go dancing (can be substituted with dance or martial arts lessons)
- Play Scrabble with MomJ
- Make and send cards (I make them but don't send them, usually)
- Go outside any time it is sunny
There's so many things that popped into my head while making this list. Obligations, duties - things that I berate myself for again and again. But these types of things will not bring joy and change to me. Feeling guilty and whipping myself for things I have not done won't free me from the undertow. Nor will it quench my thirst.
Breathe. And let it out.